Category Archives: love

Good-Bye, 2013!

This morning my husband admitted  he was thankful to say goodbye to 2013.  He’s the stable one in the family, the glass half-full man who walks steadily by faith through the valleys and the mountaintops. If he’s ready to bid the year good-bye, it really was a hard year. 

In fact, that was part of the reason blogging has been so sporadic for me this year, funerals, illnesses, and other heartaches have interfered with my time, my schedule, and my heart many times.

However, sorrow and joy always mingle together, so we try hard to remember the times of joy, and grow in grace through our sorrows. 

To close out the year, I wanted to share the Top Ten Blogs of 2013 my readers enjoyed. 

10.  My Courage Failed

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A look back to a time of discouragement.  I was flying home to a beloved family, but leaving behind an Innocent Man who had been sentenced to jail.

9.  Ten Things to Look for in The Perfect Man

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A challenge to the unmarried and a reminder to the married.  Can your relationship survive The Bed Pan Test?

8.  I Am An Old, Old Mommy

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As a toddler, my 6th child was confused that other mommies looked more like her big sister than her mommy.

7.  Why I Had Kids Not Dogs

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Tongue-in-cheek reasons why a dog never resided in our home, even though I live in an area where there are more dogs per capita than children.

6.  The Sweet Gospel Message -Vacation Bible School Idea

 

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Sweet ideas for sending a treat and the Gospel home with children who attend Vacation Bible School.

5. The World’s Most Famous Teenager

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(postcard from Anne Frank Huis, foto by Frans Dupont, in honor of Anne’s 80th birthday, June, 2009)

What childhood reader didn’t cry through The Diary of Anne Frank?  It was my first exposure to the horrors of World War II.  My husband and I visited the Anne Frank House in Amsterdam. It wasn’t a tourist destination, it was a life experience.

4.  I’ve Eaten Rattlesnake

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My 7th grade homeroom teacher was a Vietnam Vet who impacted my life in many ways, including my culinary appetite. This blog post was featured on Freshly Pressed by WordPress, an honor that earned this badge below.

It’s kinda’ like a merit badge for bloggers. It was almost as exciting as eating a pet snake.

3. Best Answers to Big Family Questionable Questions

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This was in follow-up to my #1 blog post, “Things I Would Never Say to a Parent of Two Children.” The comments were so hilarious, I featured my readers in this post.

2. When Gramma Lost her Marbles

Mindy and Gramma Geneva 1993

Laughter and tears are two reactions to unchangeable circumstances. This post was a visit back through my Grandmother’s Alzheimer’s, when I became known to her as only “The Lady with the Kids.”  I was blessed that this post was shared through Facebook support groups all across the world, and I was able to laugh and cry with others as they shared their personal stories.

1. Things I Would Never Say to a Parent with Two Kids

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I wanted to recap what it was like to be the mother of six children, highlighting all the inappropriate comments that were made in front of my children.  I took the opposite of things I heard frequently and wrote a post.  I was astounded at the reaction. To date, I’ve had 43,119 visits to this blog post.

What I’m most grateful for with this post isn’t the number of visitors, it’s what I learned from the reactions to this post.  As beautiful women poured out their hearts in the comment section about their lives, I learned that women in all circumstances have to deal with rude and painful comments from others, just as I have done. 

Above all, I was blessed that women would so openly share their hearts.  Whether they agreed with me or not, they entrusted me with their experiences and their pain.

As I evaluate these top ten posts from 2013, I see the representation of all the things that are dear to me, the Lord Jesus, marriage, mothering, extended family, and my upbringing. And I was reminded of the many joys I experienced through the year.

I was also struck with the encouragement my readers have provided through this year.  Your comments, prayers, and private emails have blessed me and upheld me during the hardest times when each keystroke in telling the story has been a dagger of pain.  Several times I even wondered if I should quit writing, and one of your dear readers would send just the perfect encouragement to help me press on in my calling. I am incredibly thankful for each of you, you are my support, my strength, and my friends.

May this coming year bless you with joy unspeakable and the ability to find joy in all your sorrows.

Happy New Year!

 

Women Vietnam Vets – Loved and Not Forgotten

 

When I think of Vietnam Vets, I picture gnarly men with ravaged bodies and wounded souls who wrongfully weren’t accepted back into our society as heroes like our beloved WWII vets. They fought an ugly battle overseas, but arrived home to find a new war on their hands. They were still the enemy, now to their own beloved country.

It’s one of those time periods in American history that still causes me personal outrage.

The vets attempted to get medical help, jobs and an education while battling personal demons and war protesters. The  war in America was as devastating as the one they had just fought.  The American government made them go and the American public didn’t want them back.

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In looking through old pics when the Vietnam Traveling Wall (blogged here)  I realized like most Americans, I was leaving out the American women who served, suffered and/or died in Vietnam. I took pictures of the flowers and of some of the tags, but never revisited these memories.

Until now.

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There are names of eight women chiseled into the black granite of the Vietnam Veterans Memorial, also referred to as The Wall.

In all 265,000 women volunteered;  10,000 of those women served within combat.

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1LT Sharon Ann Lane, USA was a nurse who died when her hospital was hit by a Soviet rocket.

On his website, Gary Jacobson shares his personal experience of being injured during Vietnam War. “Sharon Ann Lane truly epitomized that unselfish healing I received. She tenderly administered to the slings and arrows of that most terrible beast called war. She gave of her very essence in this greatest act of love, meting out her healing to nourish and restore not only abundant physical wounds, but also by her goodness assuaging insidious mental afflictions that a treacherous war implants in the minds of “boys next door.”

A further biography is here. A blog post about Lane is here.

I didn’t have pictures from the memorial of the other seven, but they are listed below.  Click on each picture to read more about their lives and their contributions.

 

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The first women POW was a missionary doctor.

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Dr. Vietti was a Christian Missionary Alliance medical missionary who died doing what she wanted to do from the time she was a child growing up in Bogota, Columbia, the daughter of a traveling geologist.

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Dr. Vietti is shown during surgery.

 

(All images lead to informative websites.  I encourage you to grab some Kleenex and click on each icon.Take your time.)

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From a page called Many Women Served.   Follow various links to see the ways different women served.

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This memorial was dedicated November 11, 1993

Those that were in Vietnam speak more powerfully than I can. Read more by clicking the links below:

Again, all images below are hyperlinks to read more about the men and  women who served during the Vietnam War. Honor them by  keeping their stories alive.

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The women from Vietnam who returned ended up missing in action in America. They were not welcomed home, nor were they hailed as heroes.

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They rarely told anybody they served in Vietnam. Many didn’t know they were entitled to GI education benefits. Many gave birth to children with health issues.

They hid in the shadows of their own horrific memories and kept their pain to themselves , while never forgetting the permanent death stench in their nostrils, the terrified cries of the dying and the heaps of mutilated flesh.

America makes mistakes. But I believe we are different as a nation even in our failures. When our errors are admitted and discovered, we try to rectify the situation. We can’t undo the damage, but maybe in the future, we will be quicker to see our errors and quicker to relieve the suffering of those who suffered for us.

Our diligence and determination in honoring the women of Vietnam should match  the diligence and determination in which they served.

We must assure these women of Vietnam –

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Making your home sing Mondays

What Makes an Anniversary Happy?

Today is our 27th wedding anniversary.

I’m thankful for the years together, and blessed that we’re still best friends and deeply in love. This is the marriage we purposed to have years ago, and with the grace and strength from  the Lord, we are experiencing this.

People who may not know our lives, may  think  our marriage is happy because our life has been easy. Without going into great details, the exact opposite has been true. We approached the financial problems, parenting and health issues, many moves and job challenges with the goal of drawing closer together instead of further apart.

It wasn’t just a goal or a glib platitude; we fought for this. When our marriage was tossed into the storm, we clung to each other and the Lord. 

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The cord of three is the rope that rescues.

PRAY to FIND EACH OTHER:
Like most young people, our marriage really began in the earnest prayers we poured over our respective lists of "Things We Want in A Spouse." Along with the prayers, we purposed to not compromise our standards. If the Lord was good enough to hear and answer our prayers, then we were going to have the faith that He would provide the answer to our prayers. We were willing to wait for the person that suited those attributes we each desired in a mate.

PRAY to HELP ONE ANOTHER:
Complete unity requires complete honesty. We tell each other absolutely everything. The only information we withhold is in a counseling situation, especially if we are asked to not tell our spouse.

Complete honesty means complete honesty about our own life and each other’s. We take the spiritual admonitions to exhort, encourage and rebuke one another to heart, knowing that we are brother and sister in the Lord. We pray about each other’s strengths and weaknesses, then we may speak about them, then we pray more. It is vital to not only point out spouse’s spiritual gifts or their faults, but to pray for them.

PRAY SPECIFICALLY:
I specifically pray for my husband concerning his spiritual gifts, relationships, parenting, performance at work, wisdom, blessing, his Bible reading and Biblical understanding, his role as an elder, and his unsaved family members. I pray specifically for situations he needs to make decisions about, I pray about conversations he needs to have or is having, and I pray for his influence on others.

For myself, I pray to love, honor and obey him. I desire to be a good helpmeet and not be selfish. It’s too easy to have a Disney princess mentality, thinking your husband’s purpose in life is to make you look and feel like royalty. Sometimes it is about cleaning toilets and being alone because your husband is spending time with the kids, other believers or is in the Word. I pray my my joy and strength would come from the Lord so I don’t drain my husband with demands that aren’t his to meet.

 

PRAY for UNITY:
Because I purposely chose a man who had the Biblical doctrine, parenting ideals, a work ethic, future plans and beliefs on marriage roles I could wholeheartedly submit to, our marriage has been one of little major conflict. I get cranky about dumb stuff, we may argue because we are frustrated about something/something else, but we don’t disagree on the major issues in life.

We make decisions together. We pray about things, then decide what’s most in accordance to the Lord’s Word. If it isn’t a spiritual issue, we just ask for wisdom.

When we do disagree, we pray for unity. Someone has to change. Instead of each insisting on our own way, we commit to the Lord in prayer and ask Him to change our hearts. Disunity is  lonely in a marriage, and the Lord wants our hearts unified as much as we long for this.

A specific example has to do with the number of children we wanted to have. Since I was 12 years old, I wanted six kids. During our engagement, my husband thought four would be a good number. Once we began having children, he thought two would be a good number. Although my heart wanted six kids, I could feel them in my arms before they were there, it was more important to me to have unity. I prayed and prayed for the Lord to unite our hearts and plans according to His will.  The Lord answered my prayers. One pregnancy at a time, my husband’s mind was changed, by the Lord, not by me. We have six children, six that were a blessing in unity, not a happening because I insisted on my own way.

PRAY through SCRIPTURE:
Another way prayer has blessed our marriage, is by praying specific Scriptures in the Bible for ourselves and for one another. We pray for the children this way, too. We feel it is more powerful to use the Lord’s words in prayer, we are more likely to be praying in His will if we are praying His Words.

PRAY to STAY
Staying in the race isn’t the same as finishing the race well.  Growing up, Scott  spent much time with an older couple in the neighborhood. At times being in their little home was like being caught in the crossfires of a world war.  Their communication over 50 years had been yelling and bickering, even though the love and commitment were real.

Through each stage of life, your marriage must grow and change with you. It gets better, it never gets easier.  The challenges of live only increase with the increasing demands. Pray to stay your way through. 

Tying your marriage together with a cord of three that’s strengthened by prayer, is how to make your anniversaries  happy.

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To read other posts I’ve written about love and marriage, click the image or link below.

 

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       Happily Ever Afters Don’t Just Happen                    The Man She Married

         Girls' Apt 045                           

   Ten Things to Look for in the Perfect Man                  Laughter Doeth the Marriage Well

Keep Love Alive

 

I didn’t  buy When Love Dies:How to Save a Hopeless Marriage by Judy Bodmer for me. I bought it because I’m an elder’s wife and I thought it would be a good tool for the occasional marriage encouragement we do  with couples.

I was also curious. I know the author, Judy,  as we’re both members of the Northwest Christian Writers’ Association.  She’s a director for the annual Northwest Christian Writers’ Renewal and I’ve been privileged to volunteer alongside her for several years. She’s an amazing older woman I’ve grown to love and admire.  On the occasion I’ve  watched Judy and her husband work together, I’ve seen their mutual admiration, respect and affection and thought, "Judy? Really? She had marriage troubles? And she’s willing to admit it?"

Christians don’t always do that. Sometimes we put on our church clothes and our church words and play a part. We don’t always delve into personal lives the way we should for mutual encouragement and burden-bearing.

Do you know anyone you could walk up to right now and truly confess what you’re going through? Would you get the spiritual wisdom you need? Would your confidence be kept?

Judy caught my heart, by opening hers. She graciously combines the wisdom of human experience and the wisdom from her study of the Word of God. Through the printed page, she is the wiser, older woman your heart has been longing to know.

I made the mistake of reading this on an airplane with only half a package of travel tissue, ya’ know, those little ones you carry in your purse, but the tissue is folded up so much, that by the time you get it all the way unfolded, you need more than one?

When Love Dies

I began taking notes of her admonitions and I knew I would be reading this book again.  And again….and again…

There isn’t any marriage that’s at a state of  perfection and doesn’t need encouragement.  I wasn’t packing the suitcase on the way out of the door, but I learned how to keep it from getting to that point.

But, this book doesn’t relate to only marriage, it relates to ANY relationship you have. When you see the word “husband” just substitute the name of anyone you are struggling with.

Like she was peeking through the dirty windows of my heart, Judy describes the Symptoms of An Unforgiving Heart, p. 41

1. Blowing up over seemingly small things

2. Sarcastic remarks that are meant to hurt

3. Talking about your husband to others

4. Criticizing

5. Correcting

6. Unexplained headaches, stomach problems, fatigue

7. A bout of tears for no apparent reason

Though the book is written at a time when her marriage was struggling, it could be read by newlyweds to keep themselves from getting to that point.  It could be read by happily married couples, to have an even better marriage.

I didn’t buy When Love Dies for me, but it was exactly the book I didn’t know I needed to read.

It also might also be the book you didn’t know you needed to read.

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Despite trying for days to use one of those fancy blog give-away plug-ins, I couldn’t figure it out. Crying face We’re still going to do the old-fashioned way this week.

My giveaway will be open from Wednesday, February 13th at 5am Pacific time until Monday, February 18th at 12:00pm.

There are three ways to enter. You may enter three times if you qualify for each of the three different options.

1. Leave a comment on this blog about something you do to keep love alive in your marriage. We all could use the encouragement! Include your email address.

and/or

2. Like my Mindy Peltier Author image42 page. Click on the FB icon to find me. Return to this  blog  post and leave a separate comment letting me know you did this. (All new followers will get credit for this, even if you liked me before the give-away.) Include your email address.

and/or

3. Become a follower of this blog if you aren’t already. Look for this image_thumb3_thumb and fill out your email address. Leave a comment letting me know you are a new follower. Include your email address.

 

MANDITORY! You must leave your email address with each entry.  I can’t find you without it.  Entries without email addresses will be deleted.

Thank you for visiting my blog, I appreciate all my followers and visitors!  May you always find encouragement for the journey when you visit here.

First Day of School Traditions

Some traditions need to be nixed.

Getting into my Jeep and finding an empty gas tank
whenever I share my vehicle,
is not a good tradition.

Having to refill all the toilet paper holders in the house
(click on link to read about my amazing skillz)
because I am the only one capable,
is not a good tradition.

Knowing that the moment I put away the mop,
someone will spill on the floor,
is not a good tradition.

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Flowers and chocolate for the first day of school?
That’s a good tradition.

Traffic was harsh and the hubbster was a little late coming home.
When I heard my daughters’ exclamations when he walked through the door,
I knew he hadn’t forgotten.

Know what I did?

I hid.

I crouched down beside our bed and tried not to giggle.
Ya’ know, I never was a good Hide and Go Seek player.
I’d find an awesome spot, then be so happy, I would giggle
and snort myself into capture.

This time I didn’t giggle.
Hubby came in and put something on the bed,
called for me and walked away.

I grabbed one of the chocolate love offerings,
and ducked beside the bed again.
It was quickly devoured, because I deserve it,
being the mother of six kids and starting my
19th year of homeschooling.

When he came back in, he still couldn’t find me.

To calm his fears, because I’m pretty sure he was ready to file
a missing person’s report, I rolled up my candy wrapper,
and flicked it at his ear.

When he finally found me, I felt a little silly.
Isn’t nearly 50 years old a little too old to be hiding?
Apparently not.

 

He thought I was cute.
I think he’s cute, too.

And that, my dear bloggy friends, is how we keep the marriage alive.
Buy me chocolates and flowers, and nobody gets hurt,
except by flying candy wrappers.

 

Just Because Flowers

My husband buys flowers for Valentine’s Day.

My husband buys flowers for the first day of school.

My husband buys flowers for my birthday.

He is smart enough  NOT to buy flowers after a fight,
because what wife wants the reminder?

But, to be honest, the best kinda’ flowers…..

…are the JUST BECAUSE flowers.

Flowers

Just

Because

He

Loves

Me.

Scott didn’t know at the

same time

he was picking out this bouquet,
I was reading a disturbing email that upset me greatly.

I was home, trying to figure out how to handle the situation,
crying and praying, when my dear hubby walked in with his warming smile,
these beautiful flowers and a hug of assurance.

It wasn’t just a confirmation of my husband’s love for me,
but of the Lord’s love and concern.

Before I could even tell my husband my problem, the Lord was working through him.

For over a week flowers in the middle of the dining room table preached,
“Mindy, I KNOW and I CARE. Before you can even tell anyone your problelms,
I am working in ways you don’t know or understand.
I will handle all of your problems. TRUST ME.”

I have a dear hubby and a Heavenly Father who are loving me and helping me through the joys and sorrows of life

Just

Because

They

Love

Me.

MM Meditation – Covering With Fervent Love

1 Peter 4:7-8

But the end of all things is at hand;
therefore be serious and watchful in your prayers.
And above all things
 have fervent love for one another,
 for love will cover a multitude of sins.

Where there are people, there will be sin, that’s a fact for saints and sinners.

And, where there are multitudes of people, there will be multitudes of sins.

With the multitudes of people and multitudes of sins, there should be fervent love.

Not the kind of Hallmark love that gives glossy and floral expressions once a year, not the kind of mother-in-law obligatory love that seethes beneath the surface, not the kind of social love where you express what you are expected to but don’t really mean.

This love is supposed to be a fervent love, a love without ceasing that is stretched out to veil, or cover, to hinder the spread of the sin by idle tongues, accusing mouths and self-righteous hearts.

Does this mean that all sin is covered up, so the truth of the matter isn’t revealed?

No.

We have other scripture that has already instructed us how to deal with serious sin in a brother or sister. We are to restore them. We are to pray for them, point the sin out and bring them back into fellowship.

Then the covering is keeping this process of displine under the wraps of love, so that the offending Christian sibling is restored unto the Lord in the way He has designed and the grief of the situation isn’t exasperated by others knowing and spreading that knowledge incorrectly.

Galatians 6:1
Brethren, if a man is overtaken in any trespass,
you who are spiritual
restore such a one in a spirit of gentleness,
considering yourself lest you also be tempted.

This verse is really urging fervant love to cover a multitude of little sins, to overlook those minor faults and failures you may observe in other believers.  It’s loving them as they are, loving them as Christ loves them, and not broadcasting their failings to anyone but the Lord, as you go to Him in prayer. 

And, as the mirror of God’s holiness reflects back into your life, that same fervent love will cover your multitude of little sins.

But, as we’re observing others lives, we are to be watchful in prayer, or simply – as we watch others lives, we pray.

Like a mother putting her children to bed for the night, we are to gently spread our fervent love over the sins of those around us, carefully tucking it in with prayer.

This blog will be posted on Motivate Me Monday,
sponsored by the Fifth Street Mama. 
Follow me over for fresh spiritual
encouragement to begin a new week.